Dating an Older Man

16:41 Lissa Reed 0 Comments

 I usually use a different man for every post I write and narrate my story. This time I won’t; and the primary reason for this is that every single man I ever dated was older than me. Some of them with as few years difference as 5 and some of them up to 16 years of age difference. And I know I’m not alone, I know there are a lot of you out there who prefer dating older men, for different reasons. But all of you that have dated an older man know there is a bad side to it, as well as the benefits. This post will give you the reasons for dating an older man, how to handle them and why more often than not, dating an older man doesn’t work out!

Dating an older man: Why we do it

 Well this should be straight forward. An older man is more mature. At every age, from the teenage years until young adulthood, it is commonly known that women are more mature than men. So it is only natural for a woman to turn to an older man, who will at least have the same level of maturity as her, if not even more. Another reason is that they have experience, in every aspect of life. You can count on him to give you a good advice and listen to you. But experience comes with age in every aspect... So naturally, an older man can be expected to be much better in bed than a guy in his twenties. To put it not so mildly: he’s been around the block and knows how to use his cock. You can expect an older man not only to give you multiple orgasms but also to teach you lot of things in bed that you probably had no idea until now.

 Above all, an older man is charming. But, unless you are the kind of girl that goes for older men, you won’t be able to understand this. Trying to explain this to many of my friends I realised I was short of words... which makes me wonder: why is it so hard to explain what is charming about the men we choose? What is it about an older man? Is it the small wrinkles around his eyes every time he smiles or the grey hair that just started showing? After having dated older men for the past 6 years, I still can’t decide.


Dating an Older Man: How To Do It

   If you are interests include staying out until 5 in the morning every night, mixing cheap brands of wine and vodka just to get wasted or your number one hobby is ‘shoes’ then dating an older man is definitely not for you. For the rest of you, if you happen to date an older man, you should know that there would be a number of different places that he would choose to go different your friends', and he would probably be in a different state in his life. So while he doesn’t expect you to tell him how many children you want to have in the future, because you simply have no idea yet, he definitely does not want to hear about your friend who got wasted and threw up all over the night bus. How about finding a common topic of conversation? It is only natural that you would have less knowledge on most topics, and that’s ok. That’s one of the reasons you choose him anyway, you learn from someone that knows more from you. Don’t be scared to be naive sometimes; once again, it’s fine. You are still learning, and he probably will find that adorable. Try to relate to him with your experience, to find out his interests and show interest, you’ll learn something new with him all the time.

 Do you ever wonder what is the reason an older man chooses to date us? He likes taking charge, so let him. It’s beautiful most of the time. He knows you are a strong independent woman, but he’s gone around the block way more many times that you have. Let him protect you, let him care and watch and learn. Enjoy it. You can let him take control if you trust him; you will find pleasure in it and he will secretly love it.

 I sometimes find it hard to understand why older men will choose us... but after thinking about it for a while, I came to think of it as a fair deal: you both get something out of it. He likes you because you are young, fresh, full of energy and life, and you remind him of years past. And you like him because he’s mature, charming and possibly (in the best of cases) you see in him something you want to become in a few years time.  So if possible, let him inspire you. He probably knows what he wants from life and hopes that you will be the same in a few years. You might see in him a path you want to follow.


Dating an Older Man: Why It doesn’t work out

 As you probably have seen for yourself, if you do date older men, more often than not, it doesn’t last for long. You might be the one to end it, or he might be the one, but it really doesn’t matter because often it’s due to one of the most common reasons.

 If your relationship with an older man has ended it could be primarily because you are in two different places at the moment. And that’s only natural: he’s been where you are, and you are yet to get where he is now. He’s probably going to be one step one ahead of you whatever you do in life. You both probably want different things – and it’s only natural. I would say that something is wrong if you both were on the same page. But that’s what’s beautiful about it! Yes, this might be expirational dating, and you know this isn’t going anywhere from the minute you jump into a relationship with an older man. No, he is not Prince Charming and he is not the man of your dreams – you probably won’t get married, have lots of babies nor ride off into the sunset. Also, you might find yourself falling in love with him, much before he does- if he does. Again, that’s only natural: you are young, naive and still learning. I know I’ve been there. It doesn’t always end nicely – he might leave you, long before you see it coming or you mind leave him,, because you realise this is doomed. You might get hurt, but when it’s all over, you’ll know it was a great experience – I always see it this way. You learn a lot more than you thought you could in a relationship and you mostly have good memories – and don’t get me started on how much you can learn in bed. He might make you consider doing things that didn’t even cross your mind.

I know what you are thinking: ‘if I know it’s doomed even before it starts, why bother?’ And you are right! But unless you have been there, you won’t know why it’s worth doing it. If you have been there, I hope this article has helped you find some reasoning in what you do; and also helped you see you are not alone. If you haven’t been there, maybe now there’s a chance you’ll consider something new. And if not, then it’s just something more to learn about dating.


 Have you ever dated an older man? How was your experience? How far did the relationship go? Comment and let me know your thoughts!!! 

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