Giveaway: 2 Tickets to an Edgy and Modern Performance on Dating in New York!



 Dating is mysterious, fun and sometimes exhausting! But as much as we love our little stories, it's always fun to sit and watch someone else's dating adventures take place! For all of you who happen to be in New York I have a new and exciting giveaway for two tickets for a Soho performance on Dating - "Donkey Punch"! The winner will win TWO tickets to a performance of his/her choice. However, for everyone who enters the competition, but does not win I will soon have a promotional code for a discount offer for all of you who wish to go and watch the show. You can win by simply connecting with facebook or your email, giving you one entry. You can also follow the instructions given below to win more entries. The winner will be contacted as soon as he/she is chosen and will be sent the voucher for the two tickets!

What is the performance about?

Uninhibited Kareena delves into monogamy while her uptight best friend, Sam, starts dating a pornographer. In the ultramodern world of sex, relationships and blurred lines, is it punch or be punched? Provocative, funny yet heartwarming, this is a tale of two very different women and what it means for each of them to be sexually free and fulfilled — and at what cost.  After a critically acclaimed run in June, Ivy Theatre has transferred their production of Micheline Auger's DONKEY PUNCH to Off-Broadway’s Soho Playhouse.

“[Donkey Punch is] an edgy and modern piece that presents relationships and friendships through a nuanced filter… Director Audrey Alford has been able to skillfully contain the characters’ tensions and our anxieties, releasing them through sexual and violent acts that flare up
 throughout the piece.” – Stage Buddy

“A fierce and biting satire... The writing is sharp as a tack, making for a most provocative
evening of theater.” – Talkin’ Broadway

CONTEST RESTRICTIONS: Winner will receive a ticket voucher redeemable for two tickets to a performance of his/her choice. Blackout dates and other restrictions may apply.




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Misc
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Is He A Player?



  I guess that after being on a number of failed dates and after getting infatuated with someone that never called one too many times, you can’t help but undergo a change – probably for the best. It is unavoidable that upon entering the dating game you are bound to make some mistakes, just like any other game. But with some experience comes wisdom and you are finally able to tell apart the guys that are worth your time and the guys that just waste it. I never considered myself as able to tell apart who is interested in going out with me for brunch on a Sunday morning and who is just interested in taking me to bed on a Saturday night – and be gone by dawn! In other words, how do you tell apart a player? I realised that I have reached a point in my dating life that allows me to finally be able to tell those time-wasters apart and reject them without a second thought not long ago..

 A couple of weeks ago I went to a bar with Sandra and Emily. Sandra I’ve known for years, but Emily I had only met a couple of times before that night. As soon as we entered the bar I saw Emily scanning every man in there and I immediately knew she was looking for a date. Knowing Emily through her friends, I knew she’s not the kind of girl that is looking for a one night stand, she’s looking for a long term relationship. Unfortunately, she’s way to naive and way too new in the dating scene to recognise the difference between the guys that wanted to take her to bed that night and a guy that would really like to take her on a date. Not long after we had settled down with our drinks I saw a guy that she was eyeing for some time walking up to her and asking to buy her a drink. It took me about 10 seconds from the moment he approached our table to know that he was just another player, so I decided that the best thing to do was to tell Emily that he was just interested to have sex with her. She wouldn’t have it though and saying he was a really nice guy she joined him at his table for a drink fifteen minutes later.  I watched the way they spoke, the difference in their body language and his unbearable arrogance and I knew that the next morning she would be expecting a phone call that would never arrive.


 So how do you really tell apart a player? Next time you are in a bar take a good look around you. A player is usually flawless – perfect eyes, perfect hair, probably smart suit and definitely a million dollar smile as well! Looking at this guy, I could see him leaning on the bar with one arm, holding the drink with the other and flashing his intoxicating smile to Emily every time she spoke, while his eyes would wonder to any girl that would pass him by. A player asks questions about yourself, but he couldn’t care less about the answer. He believes that women just want to talk about themselves and if he seems interested in their life, it would get him what he wants. It starts out with his priceless smile, progresses with a compliment and before you know it he gently strokes your hair out of your face while sliding his other hand exactly on your waistline – not too high, not too low! That’s another thing about players: They make you want them way before they give it to you, which is how they end up taking so many girls to bed (and leave before they wake up).

  A player is never hideous; he won’t give you filthy or cheesy compliments, he will make you feel special, while not giving a fuck about what you say or what you do – I almost have to admit that it actually takes a great skill to do that.  It is often common to hear a player use the ‘we’ when talking – ‘we should go to this new cafe for brunch sometime’. And note this: there’s no time frame usually. It’s usually vague, they don’t make promises, just vague statements.

Yes, players are definitely a type of guy to stay clear from, but somewhere between the endless batting of Emily’s eyelashes and her hopeful smile, I couldn’t help but wonder: Are we just naive, or could it be worse?... Are we hopelessly romantic? Maybe we do tell the players apart, maybe we can even pinpoint them immediately upon entering a bar or a restaurant and we definitely have a gut feeling to run away as soon as one of those guys approaches us; but could it be that we jump into it willingly? It is true that settling down in a nice relationship is something desirable for most women,; But because most women are attracted to those –undoubtedly – highly skilful players, and because we all dream that our prince charming will be a bad boy at heart, it is possible that we decide to give the players a chance with the mere hope that we are the ones that will change them. We hope that we will finally hear them utter those three impossible little words and then we will ride off into the sunset together. I guess it’s one of those dreams that slap you into reality once you decide to follow them a few times and then you fail.


 So I guess you can’t tell a woman who to choose to date or not, and you definitely can’t change a man. But once every blue moon a woman will realise who is worth her time and who is not, and will date wisely. But until then we will all get deceived, wait for a phone call that will never happen, and get disappointed more than once; but there’s nothing wrong with that. Eventually we learn and move on to the next level of the dating game. And in case you are wondering, Emily turned out to be a hopeless romantic. She later admitted to us that she knew he was way into himself but he was just way too charming to decline spending some time with him. She spent the night with him, he asked for her number and – surprise, surprise – he never called!

 Have you ever had such an experience? Ever dated a player who changed into a decent guy? What are your thoughts? Comment and let me know!! 
Dating 101
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WHY HAVING A MISTRESS IS A BAD IDEA BY @DATINGCITYGIRL



I know just how difficult it is to be objective and let your mind guide you when your desires take over (to say the least).  Speaking from experience, I also know the thrill of indulging into the forbidden every now and then; either to break your monotonous routineor because you are not happy in your current relationship anymore – but are unwilling to end it!  The adrenaline rush that an affair gives us is something unquestionab fly intriguing and having amistress is always the best way for a man to indulge his fantasies.  That all sounds so great, but it’s about time I snapped you out of your fantasy world and into the reality by telling you why having a mistress is a bad idea!

Why Having A Mistress Is A Bad Idea

In a world where common sense is becoming less and less common, it is not surprising to see why men miss the first reason of why having a mistress is a bad idea; someone will eventually get hurt!  Most men initiate their little escapade by having an ideal scenario in their mind: “I will have some fun for some time with a girl that doesn’t want a relationship with me, keep it casual – just sex, my wife won’t find out, I will dump the girl after a while and then go back to my marriage.  Simple and effective, no one gets hurt!”  Yeah well, I hate to break it to you, but more often than not, those scenarios fall apart faster than Kim Kardashian’s first marriage!  If you leave out the most obvious shortcoming of that plan (that the wife will find out), you have to accept the possibility of emotions getting in the middle.
Want to read the rest of this post? Visit: http://www.singleswarehouse.co.uk/2014/06/why-having-a-mistress-is-a-bad-idea/ to read my latest post on SinglesWarehouse !

Comment and let me know what you think! 
affairs, Misc, Mistress
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How Much Do We Fake?






 In a world where a girl faking her orgasm is as natural as faking her hair colour, it is no wonder that so many women keep wondering how much of our relationships are we really faking! Personally I never questioned how much faking goes on in a relationship before hearing Shayla’s story.

  Shayla and I had been friends for a few years when she met Ricky. Both Shayla and I had a pretty busy schedule, which meant that we only rarely had time to sit and talk about her relationship. She and Ricky met last year around this time and they jumped into a relationship quite fast. I remember bringing this to her attention and her saying: “Well I feel comfortable with him, I never felt like that with anyone else”. I guess at the time that was enough for me. As long as she was happy I was happy for her and that was pretty much it. 

 Somewhere between a month into their relationship and our pile of work Shayla and I had some time to grab a coffee and talk, when she told me: ‘Sex is not that great with Ricky. I’ve  been faking my orgasms with him the first few times and now I have to keep doing it, because I did it before and if I don’t, he’ll realize that something is wrong. I can’t just tell him you are not good at it!” I was speechless, everything seemed to be going so well and then she suddenly dropped a bomb on me. I had no idea what to tell her except: ‘You know nothing’s going to change unless you talk to him about it though, right?’ I remember her saying she would talk to him about it before leaving that afternoon, but truth is she never talked to me about this again and I didn’t want to bring it up.



 What really got me thinking though was what happened a few months later. When Shayla came to talk to me about a month ago she wasn’t happy in her relationship. She seemed sceptical and confused. She told me: “He’s doesn’t do things he says he will do, he’s irresponsible and forgetful; he’s unpredictable. I tried talking to him about it months ago but nothing’s changed, so I gave up. I just pretend nothing’s wrong and that I’m happy, but really I’m not”. That's when it hit me: Faking doesn't stop at orgasms. Have we gone past faking orgasms... are we faking entire relationships now? In a world where it’s natural for women to fake as much as possible- we fake our hair colour, our cup-size, hell we’ve even faked fur! – is it possible that we can fake our emotions too? How much do we really settle for and for what reason? It is true that women all around settle for a lot less than they deserve, out of fear of dying old and alone. So many think that if they are in a relationship they might as well do the best they can to stay there because this is as good as it gets... Is it better to fake it than be alone?


 When I  couldn’t decide, I turned to Javier: “I never faked a thing in my life... let alone an orgasm! If I’m not happy where I am and I can’t change it I just leave. I know I’ll find somewhere else what I deserve”. Javier made me smile, and then I realised it: The fear of being alone is admittedly a great one among single women all over the world, but (for me at least) settling is not an option. As long as you realize that you deserve much better and you don’t settle for anything, you’ll find someone else and there will be no need to fake anything.

 So maybe we can fake our hair colour, our cup-size, fur or even orgasms (but still not advisable!), but in reality, there’s no chance we can fake our emotions! Sooner or later it will catch up on you and you’ll end up hating yourself and looking for a way to get out of the hell-hole you put yourself in. So ladies, better get out of there before it gets too late. Oh and if you are wondering, Shayla didn’t settle: she stopped faking it and broke up with Ricky. Bu I knew she wouldn’t settle, it was a matter of time before she realized it. She still loves him of course, but she’s realized that the only way to be happy is to let him go and move on with her life!

What are your views on faking? Do you fake more than orgasms? Would you settle for anything less than you deserve out of fear of being alone? Comment and let me know!


As A Couple, emotions, faking,
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Why Do Men Cheat?



 I should probably begin this post by explaining why I have not been uploading any posts on my blog in the past two months. Due to the pressure of my job I had to devote my undivided attention to it, which consequently meant that my blog suffered. I have received a few emails asking if I will upload posts again and why I stopped for the past few months and I thought I should explain it on the blog as well. Having that out of the way, I also received another email recently, which brings me to the topic of this post. One of my readers sent me an email asking for advice after finding out that her husband was cheating on her. What struck me though in the email was the question that she brought up, that so many of us have thought about, but no one could come up with an answer: Why Do Men Cheat? That email got me thinking over and over again about this simple question that no one had a definite answer for. Naturally, I turned once again to my friends for their opinions and even some people that I know that have cheated on their relationships in the past. After putting together everything they told me, I realised that the answer might be even simpler than we thought! So here are the reasons that a man (or woman in some occasions) might cheat:


1. Lack of sex in current relationship: It would be a lie if we did not admit that sex is one of the primal desires of human kind. According to researches men look for sex more often than women do (allow me to doubt that a little though!). It is also true that sometimes there comes a time in relationships where sex is no longer as much a priority as it used to be; so the relationship is probably moving from the 'honey-moon' phase to a 'dry-spell' phase. It is around that time that a man will probably start looking for sex elsewhere, thinking ' If I can't get it in the relationship, I'll find somewhere else to get it from'. He will most likely not be willing to break-up with his girlfriend if he is comfortable with the way things are, but he will be more than happy to have casual sex with someone else and not feel guilty about it.


 2. They need an escape from their routine: Men are creatures of habit. They value their convenience in their everyday life and they will rarely think of changing it even if they are not a hundred percent happy with it. As long as they are comfortable they won't bother changing anything. Ironically enough, those men that are getting to bored of their daily routine -but cowardice won't allow them to do anything drastic about it - will look for a little indiscretion to indulge in, every now and then. And there is no better solution for them than cheating on their girlfriends or wives with a woman who will offer them passionate sex, whether she becomes part of their lives or she's just an one-night-stand. I remember asking Mat long ago (see Just sex... or something more? and Will he ever leave his girlfriend for you?) why he cheated on his girlfriend and the response - weird as it might be - was comparing a relationship to cooking. I wasn't sure whether he was being incredibly vain or plain honest when he told me "It's like cooking. You might cook something really nice, but you won't cook the same thing every day right?" You can tell how much impression that made on me - it's been more than 2 years and I still remember it.

3. It means nothing: As much as women hate to admit it, men value sex a lot less than women do. Both men and women excrete a hormone while having sex which make us think we are in love. However, women excrete that hormone in much higher levels than men, which makes us fall for our sexual partner a lot easier than men. Even though I hate this explanation, I can't help but accept the scientific truth behind it. So, men will just look for sex with someone else because it means absolutely nothing for them, it's just a primal desire. For them, it doesn't mean that they love their girlfriends (or wives) any less, it's just something that they like to do occasionally, something that sometimes they say: 'it's in our nature'. I think that all women agree that this is probably the word excuse that a man can give, but it is nonetheless one of the reasons that men cheat!



4. It's forbidden: Finally, this is the reasons that even I can't deny: it's appealing as hell and as wrong as cheating might be, this reason might be worth risking everything for. I guess people that can understand the thrill of something forbidden can immediately get this reason. There is something incredibly sexy in doing something you are not supposed to be doing. At times danger alone can be a turn-on. Cheating is definitely at the top of the 'NOT-to-do' List, which is precisely the reason so many men choose to do it.  When adrenaline takes over, it doesn't matter how content you are in your current relationship, you will probably give up everything just for the sake of that moment.

I guess after thinking about this question over and over again, most of us would never expect that part of the answer could be so simple. Of course by no means do I excuse cheating based on the grounds of the above reasoning. However, after getting different opinions on the topic, I had to admit that even though inexcusable, cheating can be reasoned and above all, some reasons are understandable (as bad as they may be). What else would you add on the list? Any other reason you believe that men cheat? Comment and let me know!!
affairs, As A Couple, cheating
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10 Signs He Dumped You



 You would think that the first thing that you could expect from someone you are with is honesty, however, because not all guys have  a good enough relationship with honesty (nor the balls for that matter) to tell you when they don’t want to be with you anymore, a girl needs to be clever every now and then and figure a few things out herself.  So here are the 10 Signs He Dumped You but he’s too much of a coward to tell you!


No Calls/Texts

What is a more obvious sign than stopping initiation of contact with you?  You were used to waking up with a ‘good morning’ message from him everyday, and then one day it suddenly stops without warning.  If he suddenly stops contacting you then you should start wondering if something’s wrong.

Wanna know more about the 10 Signs He Dumped You? Head over to Singles Warehouse by clicking on the link above to read my latest article and comment with what you think should go on the list!
when it's over
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